The Year of Living Gorgeously: Eurovision

Eurovision... I can't even begin to fathom who came up with it or why it would still be going. I refuse to research it, either, or I'll only spout nonsense factoids at the party. It's a festival of cheesily terrible music with one entry from each 'European' country (loose definition: this year includes Russia....) with the winner hosting the next year's event. Last year's winners were a Finnish death metal band (left) and so all eyes are upon Helsinki this weekend.

Terry Wogan is a cuddly presenter of brilliance who hosts a breakfast show on BBC Radio and is the UK's contribution to the 'commentators'. His method is to get increasingly drunk and mock the dreadful entries, and then comment wryly on the 'surprising' voting of each country for its allies or desperate impressors. (For example, the eastern block usually vote for the UK in an attempt to gain favour and eventual entry into the EU. Tenuous but true.)

This year, my Year of Living Gorgeously has propelled me to host a Eurovision party. This will involve each guest coming as a country and bringing appropriate cuisine and liquor. The main aim of the party will be to get drunk, dance badly and mock costumes, singing ability and songs. Gorgeous, moi? Always...

The last Eurovision party that I attended, the drinking instructions were to down a shot of Euro-cocktail (a bowl of all the random liquor brought by guests) upon sighting any of the following: cowboy hats, fishnet tights, broken musical instruments and sequins. I don't think I lasted more than an hour.

Anyway, back to the case in point....

The invitations have gone out, courtesy of the Helsinki website...(read the wording closely - it's hilarious...)

The Shrine to Terry Wogan is under construction...

The top ten suggestions for the best Eurovision Party that I will be following are:

Buy naff plastic bunting and adorn the party zone with euro-flags
Salute the cheesey music with suitable food: Cheese Fondue (European and Cheesey!) is ideal. Or... Have a buffet of regional dishes. This needn't be complicated: I'm going for German Sausage on the barbeque, Greek Salad, Turkish Falafel and cucumber sandwiches for UK.
Lots of alcohol, preferably cheap and luminously brightly coloured. The more incomprehensible/unreadable the label the better
Either... Nominate a country per guest in advance to ensure appropriate costumes
Or... Get a bowl together of country names on paper slips and give out as guests arrive
Or... Get a bowl of little presents associated with the country to give out as guests arrive: think Eiffel Tower for France, a small pebble (Stone) for Estonia. You may have to think creatively!
Make 26 small cupcakes and decorate each with a cocktail stick flag of each country. Be sure to leave room on the flag for identifying the more obscure ...
Download the scorecard from the BBC site and drink each time your country gets awarded nil or douze poits. (
Don't forget the Terry Shrine. Images, candles, a copy of his book
Finally... make sure you clear plenty of room for dancing. And drinking. That's important.

Tune in next week for photos and post-mortem. I can't wait.

Comments

Hilarious!!!! Can I come to your party? I don't care which country I am as long as it's not France because they never win. I'll bring something really cheap and blue to drink.

Posted by: midcenturyjo | May 11, 2007 at 10:54 AM

The Husband is under pain of DEATH to rig up some way of watching the UK version here in the US. It's apparently being streamed live over t'Internet but will be without Terry's commentary so therefore no use at all.

LOVING the shrine to Terry. Apparently Terry's tipple of choice is Baileys so you have to have a lot of that at the party. The last Eurovision party we held involved drinking vodka shots whenever your country got douze points, which resulted in some people being practically comatose and others being stone cold sober.

The BBC website has loads of good party ideas as well. Oh and I thought nobody voted for the UK anymore, which just goes to show how far we've come down in the world...

Posted by: paola | May 11, 2007 at 06:10 PM

It makes me ashamed to be European. We are supposed to be cultured, the Americans look up to us and our history and then we go and do the Eurovision Song Contest year after year. What's up? I am now depressed.
Have a great party, I am going to one where you have to wear something pink so I went to a charity shop today and bought a furry pink pig backpack. I think I will look very fetching myself.

Posted by: Di Overton | May 11, 2007 at 08:25 PM

It's an institution!! You gotta love it.

I am listening to Terry on Radio 2 now with Jonathan Ross (tune in online, very funny) and it's getting me all excited. I wish I had organised a party but sadly not. Have you seen out entry? SO proud... I am secretly voting for Moldova to win.

Posted by: Leela | May 12, 2007 at 10:42 AM

Di, the Song Contest is art. High art. It takes a great civilisation to create something so profoundly entertaining. Non-Europeans I've watched it with previously have been quite literally awestruck.

I hope pictures of the pink pig backpack will materialise on the blog before too long.

Pxx

Posted by: paola | May 13, 2007 at 08:25 AM